Gizmo is in the dog house.
Roughly a month ago, we rearranged furniture inside the Clarkston Zoo. We put a hardly-used couch next to the kitchen counter — bad idea.
When we are in the kitchen, Gizmo props himself on the back of the sofa and pops his head just high enough where all we see are big eyes staring at us — only he isn’t looking at us but instead seeing what he can get his paws on when we are not home.
He has helped himself to counter treats twice.
The first time he ripped open a bag of pistachios. I found the bag on the living room floor when I arrived home from work one evening. He thought he was clever by placing a few of the nuts on his bed for later, but to his disapproval, I scooped them up.
On his second visit to the counter buffet, he grabbed caramel rice cakes. I wasn’t home, but the lady human was. She said she scolded him, but I doubt that happened — Gizmo does no wrong.
I have been eating more than my share of caramel rice cakes recently. That’s because the lady human and I are on a stupid diet. For the past three Octobers, we have taken part in Lindsay Knight’s evil 30-day challenge, which bans every yummy food item — I’m grumpy without my daily cookie, ask my coworkers.
I set the bar high by losing 18 pounds during the first challenge. The next two challenges have not been as successful.
This October is going the way of the past two. I have shed only two pounds in two weeks — I could have had the same results by sticking to a drumstick diet, you know, the tasty cone filled with ice cream and goodies found in the freezer section at the local grocery store.
I get discouraged every time I step on a scale, and even though I tell myself that I’m not going to weigh in, I do it anyways. Maybe it is time to move the scale out of the bathroom. Or perhaps it is time to end this ridiculous diet. Gizmo gets to eat what he wants, so I should as well.
WORLD SERIES DROUGHT
With the Washington Nationals clinching a spot in this year’s World Series, the Seattle Mariners are now the only team in the MLB to have never advanced to the fall classic.
The Mariners — formed in 1977 — have come close to playing in the World Series three times, advancing to the American League Championship Series in 1995, 2000 and 2001. The latter year they won a record 116 games but were ousted by the Yankees in six games.
With Seattle in a rebuild, it doesn’t appear the World Series drought will end any time soon.
At least Seattleites have the Seahawks.
It was a rough Week 6 for Gizmo as the pooch went 0-5 and dropped to 11-19 on the season.
I was a bit better, posting a 3-2 record, which has me sitting at 19-11 entering Week 7.
KANSAS CITY AT DENVER
Wow. The Kansas City Chiefs enter tonight’s game at Denver on a two-game losing streak.
The Broncos’ defense under first-year coach Vic Fangio is finally taking shaping, shutting out Tennessee last week.
This is a tough spot for the banged-up Patrick Mahomes.
OAKLAND RAIDERS AT GREEN BAY
I’m starting to believe in the Oakland Raiders, especially after they took out Chicago two weeks ago in London.
For the Raiders, it is all about keeping the game close and feeding rookie running back Josh Jacobs.
Green Bay’s run defense is suspect, while its offense is beat up.
After starting the year 3-0, the Dallas Cowboys are now 3-3 heading into this pivotal NFC East tilt with the 3-3 Eagles.
The winner of this game takes the early control of the division.
BALTIMORE AT SEATTLE
Russell Wilson for MVP. The dude is having a monster season, passing for 1,704 yards and 14 touchdowns with no interceptions. He has completed 72.5% of his passes and has rushed for 151 yards and three touchdowns. He has carried Seattle to a terrific 5-1 start.
Seattle’s defense will be tested this week by Baltimore quarterback Lamar Jackson, who has passed for 1,507 yards and 11 touchdowns and rushed for 460 yards and two scores.
If Wilson weren’t blowing up the league, Texans quarterback Deshaun Watson would be the MVP.
Watson orchestrated the upset over the Chiefs at Arrowhead last weekend and has passed for 1,644 yards and 12 touchdowns while adding another 164 yards and five touchdowns with his legs.
The Colts have also topped Kansas City in Arrowhead and head into this game with a 3-2 mark, just a game back of the Texans.